Originally posted on August 9, 2014, by cruisingrunner
We arrived in Tonga two days ago, and like a good little tourist, I read up a bit about Tongan culture before we arrived. Three notable customs are worth mentioning here, since they differ so much from our own lifestyle.
1) The Tongans are deeply religious, and Christianity is the dominant religion. Sunday is reserved for worship and fellowship, and things like fishing and diving on Sundays are even illegal (according to my guidebook). Cruisers are discouraged from doing any outwardly obvious boat work projects or things like hanging laundry to dry in order to respect the Tongan Sunday observances. Yesterday, which was Saturday, we attended the annual Agricultural Fair in Neiafu, which was basically like any street fair we might have at home in Hermosa Beach or Manhattan Beach, with vendors selling everything from food to jewelry to crafts to artwork. This is an important event here though, and it was attended by the King of Tonga himself as well as the Deputy Prime Minister and many other very official looking people. We arrived just as they were shutting down all the shopping and a presentation started including music and speeches by all the stately important people. We were warned ahead of time that there would be no fewer than six different prayers during the ceremony, and although it was all done in the Tongan language, I could tell that some of speeches did sound to be prayer like. My point in bringing this up is that there definitely isn’t separation of church and state in Tonga.
2) Tipping is not common here, and it can actually be interpreted as an insult, since it can be seen as implying that you think they need your handouts. I’m sure in the more touristy areas with lots of western visitors they know and understand that it’s just part of our culture and don’t get too offended, but the guidebook actually discourages tipping. (As an aside, while in American Samoa I had incorrectly attributed this concept to the Samoans, and I failed to tip our taxi driver who brought us from the laundromat back to the dock with 10 loads of laundry. I hope I didn’t unintentionally insult him by *not* tipping while I was trying to not insult him by tipping.)
3) The women dress modestly here. The guidebook recommends women have their shoulders and knees covered when going ashore, and I’ve tried to abide by that, wearing a long skirt one day and capri pants another. This is quite problematic for my running, though. Yesterday, I wore my capri running pants (that I had to rummage around the boat to find since I haven’t used them since leaving home) under my shorts. It was not exactly a comfortable solution given the heat and humidity, but luckily the sun remained hidden during most of the run, and then it even rained to cool me off. It wasn’t enough rain to be unbearable, just enough to sting my eyes as I moved along forward. I’m not sure I’ll be able to bear running in pants when the weather clears up and the sun is shining (although it’s been raining for so long, it seems like it will continue indefinitely). One of the guidebooks says shorts and t-shirts are OK to wear, as long as the shorts aren’t too short. Well, I don’t know the exact definition of “too short,” but my running shorts are pretty short, as most running shorts are.
I’m trying not to be too annoyed by any of this. I am, after all, a visitor here, and I’d like to respect and appreciate everything about it, including all the differences. And yesterday as I was running, I was trying to thing about potential positive aspects of the societal norm here that women cover up a bit more. We in the west tend to have a knee jerk negative reaction to these sorts of things, because we see it as limiting our freedoms that we are so accustomed to. But I was wondering if perhaps women here have fewer issues with body image, that are almost epidemic in the U.S. Perhaps having the freedom to dress half naked is a freedom we should have on principle, but exercising that freedom may not always be in our best interest.
We are planning to be in Tonga for two to three months, and I’m looking forward to getting to know the place better, and maybe get to understand some of the nuances of the culture that you simply cannot get from a guidebook.
-D.
Gresham Family Exodus 